Thanks for tuning in Luvz! Lets sit back in our Corner cut and sip tea while we discuss role Advantage/disadvantages within the relationship….
Now I know you’re confused about what I mean when I’m referring to advantages within the relationship,but I’m going to break it down for you. We all know that every partner, man or woman has certain role advantages within a union. Such as the protective , the feisty, the jealous one, the firecracker, the love, or the brains and the brawn and and so on. When these roles come about they can either be an asset/advantage or a burden/disadvantage within the relationship.
Let me just say I’m working on finding which role I need to play within my relationship. I have someone who’s roles are protector, lover, cautious, jealous, and understanding. Clearly a role combination is complicated, but that’s not a bad thing. Some of this can come as an advantage because when you know the roles within your union you can navigate accordingly, or at least make the effort to do so.
You know if you have a protector you’re safe with them. If you have a cautious lover you can be sure that they’ll try their hardest not to hurt you because a cautious lover is a lover who will try an protect your union, right? A understanding lover takes the role of the survivor/savior as well. This is because they understand and can almost literally feel how you’re feeling within your roll. They won’t let you give up on what you’re building, because a lover doesn’t gives up on love unless they’re forced to.
Now when it comes to roles like jealously that’s neither here or there. This is where the others roles within your relationship come into play. If you’re not playing your role this is where the burden/disadvantages come in. Whether that be the fighter, the distant, the heart keeper, or the safe place, every role has to be played accordingly. The jealous roll wouldn’t be showing up in a problematic manor if the other spouse was playing their roll as the love harborer.
You and your partner need to take time out to identify which role each one of you will play within the relationship. When this is done the other person will know how to present themselves in certain situations where role-value comes into play. A unsure heat is a dangerous heart, this is why everyone has to do their part of playing your roll. Don’t use the knowledge of these roles to your advantage in a manipulative way, use them in a way that helps you love and understand your partner better. When doing this you can’t go wrong because everything is on the table… Every secret, every hurt, every scar, and every unspoken harbored emotion because you know your spouse.
Learning to identify one’s role can be difficult if you aren’t paying attention to your spouse. You have to be mindful of their past to make a new present! This is because in the past they played certain roles just like you did and in those roles they wound up being hurt. So sometimes when you’re starting something different trying to figure out the roles is a big deal. To play your role you have to know your role, To Know Your Role you have to listen and learn your role because everyone has different roles to play luvz.
In this journey of learning and growth I’m going to tell you to be mindful of your partner because not doing your part can hurt your union. You may not even know that you’re hurting them when you’re not playing your role, but eventually it will come out and it all will come down to who played their role correctly and who did not. -Donnie Sharrell