AskDonya (The Key to love barriers 🔑) #informative/conversation #relationship #Advice

Thanks for tuning in luvz! Lets sit back and chat a while..!

Ok, when I’m referring to love barriers, Im referring to a variety of things that we’re going to get into. So as always I’ll separate the barriers for each sex as informatively as I possibly can, and section by section we’re going to unravel and unpack. So.. Men have their own barriers when it comes to love because of course, Society holds them to a certain standard when it comes to being a man. Women have their own berries as well, because we’re viewed in a certain light on how we carry ourselves as one. When you choose love the barriers become just as substantial, but we are held to a different standard within the union.

Example: When a man chooses to love a woman, he becomes vulnerable. The barriers he faces is the back lash around his vulnerability with us as his woman, and peers. A man is taught to be tough, rough and closed off, but falling in love trump’s this all for a man. Past hurts, the not knowing if his vulnerability is being taken advantage of, and doubt start to become love barriers in the midst of this all. This is what causes the friction within the union on his end. This is where the petty fights, emotional disconnect and confusion sneaks into his heart and mind.

Sujata Banerjee wrote somewhere that Test and doubts kills relationship.. which always stuck with me after I’d read it. It stuck because it’s truth! Meaning: Nine times out of ten one of these things being drug out without FIXING, is what caused a relationship to fall apart. When you let doubt carry on it stats to affect the trust you and your partner share. Once the trust has been affected then comes the tests that become offensive and repetitive. Now we have two people that have no clue where they stand With one another, and the love barriers are becoming a block that’s turning the love meter cold.

This is where The woman starts to panic first then she/we will react, especially if we’re caught off guard. Most of us keep our relationship in the light of what most men would refer to as a fairy tale, and once that vail has been lifted and our partners press on with the negative this becomes an issue. I just recently went through having to explain this out because that gets miscued. Trying to live out the perfection of love, and thinking everything is a perfect fairytale are two different things!

Our love barriers as women grow with us like scars. The fact that most of us blindly drop those barriers going into a new relationship allows the honey moon faze to be able to take place. This is not always the smartest move because that means you’re letting love lead, and when love leads you’re able to be caught off guard by his love barriers an doubt. Then comes the shut downs, that person inside that you fought to leave in the past when you began this new journey stats to resurface. This is how things start to go bad and then come to and end for so many couples.

We have to be willing to let our other half’s be vulnerable. Doing this comes the hard part. As always I say communication, understanding and willingness are the huge gets, which is the truth. You need to practice all of these tools to be all you can be in your union but there’s one other thing I’m not going to hit too deeply on yet. Compassion! We try and remember to communicate but we stop short, often forget to communicate with compassion in our intimate relationship’s.

Im trying to do this right now as I’m dealing with a deeply compassionate being. We need to learn to love blindly again and think from within the people we chose to love. This will help us see why they love us and learn self, as well as learning to love the way the other desires. So my luvz, the key to breaking love barriers may vary well be the compassion you unleash within your lover. -Donnie Sharrell

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