Donyaz Corner Tea Time!

Thanks for tuning in Luvz. Let’s sit back in our corner cut and sip tea while we discuss the darkness that can ruin love..!

When it comes to letting pain ruin things I definitely can relate! See when your heart breaks its hard to refocus and maintain the things you love the most. My heart’s like a steel wall on the outside, but soft and melts like butter on the inside. When I love I love hard, no guard up and no ill intensions. So when i feel like my love an efforts are being disrespected and discarded, I go into a dark space inside. I start to question my decision and analyze the person I’ve chosen to let behind that steel wall.

See Luvz we all have a dark space that we’ve had to grow from. Some of our darkness is darker than others and some stem from broken love. The stem of mine runs deep, the darkness I endured should have surely killed me. People like us love and yearn for it on a way deeper level than the one that can be seen. But our expectations for the ones we choose to love is way too high and that’s what cuts us deep. We can’t expect our lovers not to disappoint, we can’t let them in and then when they don’t follow the rules of ate darkened hearts explode and leave.

When I get hurt Im use to looking at who did it first, how it’s similar to the pain that someone else caused and how I let that break me. I harbor on the fact that I gave good honest love, so why can’t you! That’s no good because everybody’s hearts not like mine or yours and the way you give love isn’t always meant to be given back that same way to you! Love is a tricky thing it can hurt and it can heal. But if you let the pain override the love then it becomes a big mess of hurt people hurt people which turns things into a catastrophe. No one can live you fully if your expectations are too high. You have to leave room for era so that learning to love you won’t be so hard.

Being broken from the day I was born made it hard to heal from new hurt because you’re always looking for the next one. We have to stop and let sorry be just that! Don’t dwell on that what happened but focus on the healing and the amazing things that can come. See i got lost in my pain and wanted him to feel exactly what he’d done. But my hurt set on top of old hurt and my mind and heart all spun. I was pissed off and i went and hid behind that steel wall. Instead of bringing love with me I pushed it away before the healing even begun.

See all I asked was that he and I have an understanding as one. But because I wasn’t counting on him not being certain I left my self open for disappointment. It wasn’t that he wasn’t trying or even that he wasn’t the one. I think it had to do with him not knowing my darkness runs deep and that I could explode from what he was doing. Us darkies need a safe space in the ones we choose to love. We need to be handled with care and explain to them that the little things can cause so much more.

When it comes to letting pain ruin things that I can relate to and that i will overcome. Because my pain doesn’t define me and it didn’t define the way I loved. Look Luvz are mission is to be greater than the darkness we stem from. We have to learn that not all disappointment in love is the road to the end. That we can overcome the pain and continue to trust the love of that person we choose. Its more of trusting ourselves to not be wrong about him being the light bringer to our darkened hearts. It has to be the mindset of you help me fix me and I’ll help you fix you.

So yes loves Im struggling with love at this vary moment. But today I chose to not blame him and say to myself that I let the darkness win. I will admit he tried to fix but i pulled away. Yes he could of did more and heard my heart but see he also stems from a darkened place. I let that go over my head and stopped trying to help him. I became the victim of uncertainty and that’s what’s mostly on my heart and head.

I’m noticing how I always pull away, but my mission is to find a love where I fix him and he understands and fixes me. It’s possible to be fixed through love! But only if we don’t run everytime pain hits and things get rough! We have to focus on what’s to come, and let things go so that darkness fades and instead of hiding behind our wall… We bury ourselves in that special one! -Donnie Sharrell

One thought on “Donyaz Corner Tea Time!

  1. U got a way with words I’ll give u that!! U just gave me a boost of hope n my situation!! Hopefully the stars line up for us n we can finally overcome our demons n hard feelings!!!🤞

    Like

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